Okay, so, Chinese weddings are nothing like western ones. This one was Chinese with western characteristics, but still way different. Nik, English, and his bride Sandy, chinese. Nik and Sandy both wanted a quiet affair held in Dalian, with a handful of select friends and Sandy's family. However, Sandy's parents would have none of that, and so it turned into a huge event with 200 guests (190 of which were unknown to Sandy and Nik), in Sandy's hometown of Yangquan. Yangquan, a small town of 1.2 million, with only one McD's, KFC and Wal-mart each, a village compared to Dalian, but not quite rural. We heard there were one one, maybe two resident foreigners, but we would be the main show in town. That is myself, Scott, Brett, John, and Nik's friend from Amsterdam Damon. Brett's role was best man, and as Nik doesn't speak much Chinese and Brett is fluent, he also helped with vows.
We get into Yangquan friday afternoon, have a nice dinner with Nik and Sandy, and then Nik and Sandy go off to take care of some stuff. We were planning on at least taking Nik out for something of a night, but I'd gotten a cold on the plane (surprise surprise), and everyone else was tired too, not to mention that festivities were to start at 7-8 am the next day.
Saturday morning we woke up about 6 to get ready. I was treated as a groomsmanish and so was allowed to take part in the pre-ceremony traditions, which we were told that would include the following:
At Sandy's parents house, Sandy would be inside the house, and we would have to bribe our way in with money. Sandy's parents and family would make Nik do stuff (push ups, etc) and when he'd done enough he would be allowed inside the house.
Nik would also have to carry Sandy's mother for 50 meters
Sandy had to eat 100 dumplings (fingernail sized)
Fireworks are shot off outside the house to scare away demons
manholes are covered with red paper to keep demons underground.
then a caravan to the hotel where the wedding would be held
All of this happened except for hazing Nik and making him carry mom. Although he did carry Sandy down 4 flights of stairs in his suit and her voluminous white dress.
At the hotel, Nik and Sandy had to stand in the entrance and greet the 200 guests they didn't know (note the time is about 11 AM)
When we get upstairs to the banquet hall... there are 20 tables with red tablecloths and red covered chairs and in the entrance is a giant red heart made out of paper or whatever. Did I mention the stage with the red backdrop and a 3 foot picture of Nik and Sandy in the shape of a heart?
On every table there's already 10 dishes(no chopsticks yet), a bottle of wine, coke, orange juice, and baijiu. Most tables are already into the alcohol, but we're waiting, as should be tradition until the ceremony starts.
The lights dim and the emcee starts. yup that's right, emcee. A host for the day who talks in flourished Chinese about love and commitment (quite rehearsed as he's done it who knows how many times before). Nik and Sandy enter together and give eachother something like vows, Nik has to pledge his faithfulness to her father (Brett helps). the emcee says some more stuff. Then Sandy pours her heart out in thanks to everyone for coming, but as she is doing this people are talking and eating, hardly paying attention (chopsticks had been given out by now).
After the ceremony, Nik and Sandy spent the rest of the meal going around getting drunk doing thimble shots of Baijiu with every table in the room. Then it was like the place was suddenly empty. Everyone was gone by 1:30. crazy.
As far as gifts go, it's not the norm at Chinese weddings. hongbao, or red envelope full of money is. The emcee company or whoever (not Nik and Sandy. remember they wanted a simply no frills no gifts wedding), set up a book and a box. you dropped your red envelope in the box and they wrote your name in a grid, one square for every 100yuan ($15) you gave, for all to see. tacky? seems to be a theme.
All in all it was a lot of fun, and even though they had to make a big ado out of what they wanted to be a small ceremony, I think Nik and Sandy both also had a good time. We had a low key Saturday night, tried to not keep Nik away from his bride for too long (they're going to have a honeymoon sometime in the hopefully near future). On Sunday Nik and Damon flew back to Beijing for some sightseeing, and we came back to Dalian.
what a trip.
p.s. working on scrounging a few pictures. I took 100 plus, but, my new camera's SD card ate basically all of my pictures, argh! here are the three that survived...
Sandy, Sandy's Dad, Mum, and Nik. This was taken as Sandy was pouring her heart out in love and thanks to everyone, while they're all (few of whom actually know Sandy) stuffing their faces. Note the heart of candles on the left
Our spread of food, yumyumyum
Damon, Nik, and Brett (best man/feifei)
PARTY
ReplyDelete